When I made the call my sweet girl was working on her reading skills. As Sarah worked through the phonics lesson I hit the call button that would get me in touch with the woman I knew would be able to help a simple dream in my little girl’s heart grow roots. I didn’t now how valuable this would become but I knew it had potential to be a fun couple of days out of town and that was reason enough to make the call.
It all began one day when I was watching Project Runway on Netflix and folding laundry. Sarah came in and just fell in love. “Momma, I want to do that”, she said. I felt the excitement just flow over, around and then through her and hit me as it filled the room. This was the birth of a dream in my little ten year old’s soul.
So as I spoke with my joy breathing Aunt Andrea about how my little girl wants to learn to sew I could hear the light flood her heart. My Aunt Andrea is one of the most giving, servant hearted women I know. She comes to life when she can teach something she knows to someone she loves. I knew she would be the best soul to stand with my young girls and help her dream.
She counted down the days, she was packed 24 hours before we needed to be and she brought every project she has been working on to offer up for approval as soon as she walked in my aunt’s front door.
All Sarah knew was excitement, I could see a new bud of passion growing in her. I could smell the perfume of what is new and fresh like spring time. It was such a beautiful moment for me to share with her.
As we walked into my aunt’s beautiful home we were met by the prettiest class room I had ever seen. She had transformed her dinning room table into a sewing classroom. I set up my sewing machine and we got to work. We started by learning
the parts of the machine we planned to play with. As we learned about the different pieces there where giggles at words like dog feet, I could hear both my little girl’s joy to learn and my aunt’s passion to love.
We began sewing paper lines, watching the thread-less needle puncture a pattern on the thick white paper was fascinating. Hearing the buzz of the machines going filled my mind with funny “sweat shop in training” memes and “next generation homeschool” jokes.
I was resting in joy. Knowing that this was a safe place I sat back and relaxed into what I was doing. Then I felt the Spirit say “Watch her, this is a big moment and you won’t want to miss it”. So I watched, I stayed as quite as I could and let my aunt do the teaching. I let the moments pass from paper lines to curves on cut scraps of fabric.
Slowly the little lessons on paper began to take shape as the fabric was pulled through the machine. As we were being told how to manipulate the fabric to keep a shape I couldn’t help but see real life being the same way. When you are sewing a curved peace of fabric to a straight peace of fabric to make something like a sleeve or a design in a quilt you have to cut slits in the seam so it will be more flexible. I know this is what happens in my life all the time. Either I make the cuts to create what I am meant to create or I end up with something I can’t wear.
Again I could feel the Spirit prompting me to pay attention. So I watched, I watched my little girl get her first lesson in how sometimes you have to make a slit or even cut something of value out in order to continue creating. She may not have placed this lesson in her “Bank of Aha Moments” just yet but it planted a seed of future understanding and that was beautiful. So much life will grow from that uniquely taught lesson and I was watching. For me it most definitely went into my Bank of Aha Moments.
As day two of sewing camp rolled around and lunch was all eaten up we resumed our places at the table for phase two. We graduated from paper lines and scraps of fabric to the real deal. I had already told Sarah we would most likely be making
some PJ shorts while we were there. I guess however she didn’t fully understand me when I told her this. As I was cutting mine out of coffee inspired fabric to begin my own project my aunt began to explain to Sarah how to read the pattern. Where to cut the thin paper so she could lay it out to then cut her fabric. Sarah’s voice began to quicken with joy and her eyes grew bigger as she asked, “You mean I get to make my own pajama shorts, you’re not going to make them?”, I was shocked. I thought she understood that’s why we came all the way to Texas. I thought she knew we came so that she could be the one to make her very own something out of nothing. I thought I had explained that this was a weekend of learning and then using what she learned all by herself.Again, I was so blessed that I was paying attention and got to be part of that realization. It became clear that we had faith in her, at that moment she was flooded with the confidence and courage to try something new, something big. She knew without any doubt that we believed in her and would be right next to her every step of the way.
So many times in my young life I was so very scared to try new things because I didn’t know if I could do it, I didn’t think I could and to be sadly honest I didn’t think anyone else thought I could either. So many failed spelling tests and forgotten words while singing a song alone on stage for Sunday worship lead to me believe that my brain didn’t work the way it should. That I was always going to stand alone broken.
This weekend I felt the Spirit lead me to hush my own fears and watch Him breathe truth and light into my little girl. I watched how not every heritage that is mine is painful. I was reminded that there are people that I am born of, that I share a blood line with that have all the faith in me and my God breathed life that they would spend three days with my ten year old teaching her how to sew. Blessing her with a lesson in fabrics and threads my aunt gave Sarah’s dream a beginning. What was once an idea of possibilities now has taken up roots. For Sarah the joy of creating something out of nothing will forever have connections to this three day weekend with family.
This weekend I was challenged to pay attention to not only a heritage of wounds but a heritage of love. I will hold tightly as I move forward in my own dreams to the very real truth that I am not alone in the world of broken. I can dream and plant roots and if I look up into the faces around me I will find the confidence I need to keep going. I will find love and reassurance that I can do this.
I quite often let Fear drive me around, I think I’ll ask him to sit in the back and let Creativity drive for a while.