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Please do not resist.

Lord, I am trying not to put up a fight as you rescue me.

Some days I feel scared like something is about to happen. Something new or old but different. My fear has a way of throwing my flight signals up, and I run.

I run from what is unknown and from what if.
What if I am running from my own rescue?

I went to see the newest Star Wars, Rogue One movie with Caleb and the kids when it came out last year, and there is a line that has settled in deep. There is a droid named K-2so, in his first scene he is rescuing one of the main caricatures, as he grabs her, she falls. He stands over her and says, “Congratulations, you are being rescued. Please do not resist.”

I feel held down at times by the Spirit of Truth, but I hear him whisper these words, “Congratulations Christina, you are being rescued. Now please calm down, come out of hiding and for goodness sakes stop resisting.”

I don’t know why it feels so confusing and stressful to be rescued. I don’t know why change makes me feel like a failure, but I know without a dought that wisdom is dancing and calling out from her soul that I am safe and it is going to be okay.

I am writing a book.

I feel a pull, and it is unraveling me, pulling into the deep waters of my story.

It’s difficult to write down the words that add up to some of my deepest pains, but I know I am being rescued.

It’s a blessing to see all the ways my creator has come in like a soothing warm breeze to calm my heart and at times come to my rescue with the force of all creation to save me from myself and others.

I have set aside 2017, to create joy, to live and breathe joy. Writing parts of my story is not joyful. It is heartbreaking, and I often wonder why I am putting it down on pages. Why would inspiration call on me for this? Why would anyone want to hear this part, it hurts so much. How could it be helpful?

Again he whispers, “ Hold on to me dear soul for through this fire you are being rescued. Please do not resist.”

I write the words, I edit my pain, and I see hope shining like the resistance. Not every part of this story is dark. In fact, by the time it’s all collected, and soul kissed it will sing of hope and healing. It will be my memoir of times healed from wounds that ran deep. It will breathe, deep, life-giving breath, and it will paint a picture only the Spirit of Truth can.

It isn’t easy to be rescued. Honestly, it feels more like being in prisoned with my past.

I will tell you a secret. I would not trade being rescued in this way, not even to escape my woundings from so many years ago. They have shaped my journey, and I am who I am today because of every last one of them. I love that I am the collector of my moments and that I am being rescued through them.

May you find that at this moment Wisdom is dancing in the street calling your name and the Spirit of Truth is here whispering out to you, “Congratulations, you are being rescued. Please do not resist.”